Week 8 - Words upon the waves
Matthew 14:22-33
Jesus Walks on the Water
22 Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, 24 and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.
25 Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26 When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.
27 But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
29 “Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
32 And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33 Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”
A few weeks ago, Johannes Radvan did a great session with the interns on studying the Bible, focusing on this passage in particular. Afterwards, I was left with a lot of insights, but plenty of questions too.
Why did Peter volunteer to go on the water? Why didn’t he ask Jesus to calm the storm like before? How did he only see the wind when he got next to Jesus, when it was there the whole time? Why doesn’t Matthew describe Jesus’ return with Peter? Did Peter answer Jesus? If so, why isn’t it written?
In some senses, the answers to these would be speculation, but as I was reflecting on which of the characters I identified with, I recognised I was falling into the tempting trap of immediately putting myself in the shoes of the main character. Often, we focus on Peter in this passage, quite understandably, and ask how we can do what he did, but better.
I wonder whether Matthew actually puts us in the place of the rest of the disciples in the boat. After all, we are effectively doing what they did during the climax of the story: observing Peter’s interaction with Jesus. Except we don’t have any record of Peter’s walk back to the boat with Jesus, which surely would be both fascinating and instructive? That’s exactly like the disciples. They didn’t hear the conversation, they were still in the boat. They surely shared similar doubts to Peter, but didn’t take action in spite of those doubts.
Perhaps by Matthew’s lack of description, he is inviting us to be proactive, to take steps toward Jesus even when we don’t feel like we’ve got any idea what we’re doing. Peter did take the initiative in asking Jesus to invite him out of the boat. He showed immense trust, putting himself in a position of vulnerability. And he got a long way before sinking, all the way to Jesus. Then, when things went pear-shaped, Jesus invited him into an intimate conversation exploring his doubts together, and I imagine reducing them to some degree. A conversation where Peter could learn and grow closer to Jesus, a conversation that wouldn’t have happened if Peter hadn’t stepped out of the boat. Matthew is saying, why be satisfied with hearing Jesus’ private conversation with Peter?
Why not have one of your own?
What doubts are holding you back from taking your next steps? What doubts are holding you back from approaching Jesus? I’ve found that at the times I do remember to bring my questions to God, questions I’m not proud of, or that I don’t think I should have, I’m amazed at how quickly and how gently God starts to unpick them. Not with cheap answers, but with fresh perspective. In some mysterious way, those doubts can bring us closer to God.
The moment when Peter began to sink was “when he saw the wind”, which was there all along. Maybe he’d begun to realise the apparent insanity of what he was doing, the enormity of God’s power to keep him afloat, and grace toward him. Perhaps some types of doubt could be a sign we’re starting to grasp the wonder of God’s character, the way he treats us and how it might seem too good to be true. Then Jesus holds out his hand and reassures us it’s not, he really is that good.